This is one trigger that I changed myself and that I finally made dream of living abroad. Another lessons from Adler’s Individual Psychology by reading Courage to Be Disliked.
Looking back the days
Looking back when I dreamed of living abroad, at that moment I studied English hard expecting brilliant days abroad. I’d been keeping a diary, because memory has easily gone. I liked watching YouTube (and now also), it seemed the last resort in the severe situation.
No, I’ve done them not actually because I like them. All the reason of them is to escape from this moment. Even in a tiny moment I could escape from the present by reviewing past, seeing videos or dreaming of the future.
You know, the only existing things are the present for the present of me. There’s no past, no future. And it’s also same to see and hanging around in cyberspace under thinking of distancing from reality.
The biggest lie in life
Adler says that the biggest lie in the life is not to live now.
The present was hard, so that I had to escape from it, that’s why I hid into way long distance from now. I think usually people remember memory of goodness well. So I liked to write my memory. The diary was filled with good things, good memories. I didn’t recall rather bad things. I was good at English enough that I would better to study rather another subject. I had been telling myself the biggest lie.
Life is continuous moment and there’s no past and future in real
As well as escaping by seeing the distance, making decision of current things by the past is a lie. There’s no past and future. It’s just escaping from ambiguous, mysterious, and perhaps bad situation that might come we don’t yet see. Same as I was. Living abroad was my dream and as well, afraid, because I didn’t see the rail to the future. How wonder could I communicate with Europeans? Cars? No rice? How’s the career? On the other hand, it was easily imagined to work as it was at the same company, same place.
The author says your life looks normal and straight line, because you decide not to change constantly.
Then what I did
I started learning communication and psychology. Discard Youtube and visited many countries. Practiced Adler’s teachings in real life. Taking to many people and expressed my intention. Thought and did what I had to do to get a ticket to relocation in my company. Not get angry, no irritation.
More active and wider, which is the last choice I have never selected. Now I live in Europe.